Season 2 Episode 6

Two Places First Aired: 4/Nov/2007

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Scotty: Kevin. Why are you here? Kevin: Well, I called your cell phone, but it's disconnected. So I dropped by your place, and your landlady, who is really creepy by the way, said you no longer live there. Scotty: Yeah, well, I would love to catch up, but I just spent the last hour deboning quail, and now I'm moving onto chicken, so now is not the best time. Kevin: Okay, fine. I get it. You're mad about the whole Saul thing, but, you know, disconnecting your phone and moving is a little extreme, even for you. Scotty: This may come as a shock to you, but what's happening with me has nothing to do with you. Kevin: Okay, fine. What does it have to do with? Scotty: I'd really rather not do this here. Kevin: I'd rather not stalk my friends for them to talk to me, but I'm here. Scotty: My tuition was due, so I fell behind on my rent. And my car insurance. And my phone bill. Turns out being a cooking student and apprentice sous-chef isn't a road to financial freedom. Kevin: Why didn't you just call me? Scotty: What is it they say, "Pride goeth before the eviction?" Kevin: Oh, come on. Scotty, this is me. Scotty: I know. And you were finally starting to treat me like someone whose life wasn't a complete train wreck. Kevin: So where are you staying? Scotty: Oh, friends' futons, friends' sleeping bags - and last night, my Ranchero. Kevin: You're homeless? Scotty: Oh, I like to think of it as being between homes. Kevin: Look, I have, I've got an inflatable mattress. You should come and stay with me. Scotty: Are you really sure there's room for me, with all our baggage? Kevin: I have a boyfriend and I'm in love, so... Scotty: And your missionary really won't mind? Kevin: If he's going to be looking after poor schoolchildren, the least I can do is shelter a struggling culinary artist. Scotty: Okay. Kevin: I'll put the key under the mat. Good luck on the chicken. Scotty: Thank you. Kevin: Jason, I've tried every number you've given me, and I know I'm about to leave you the worst answering machine message in history, but I don't have a choice. Um, there's no wedding, because there's no baby. Kitty had a miscarriage, so... I'm sure Robert would love to hear from you. I'd love to hear from you. Anyway, I hope you're okay. Bye. Scotty: I'm really sorry. Kevin: Yeah. Me, too. Scotty: Is there anything I can do? Kevin: Yeah, you could deflate the mattress when you leave. I tripped on it earlier. Almost killed myself. Scotty: I'm serious, Kevin. After everything you've done for me. Kevin: No. No, there's nothing. Thank you for the thought, though. Kevin: Hey. Scotty: Hey, did you hear from Jason yet? Kevin: No. But luckily I have enough work to distract me. Scotty: Okay, I cannot let you drown yourself in legal briefs. It's too depressing. Kevin: Scotty, I am depressed. Scotty: That's because you miss him. But there are other ways to deal with it other than work. Kevin: Really? What do you propose? Scotty: Well, if you're feeling romantic about him, The Thorn Birds. If you're angry at him, The Exorcist. And if you're just in the mood for a good time, and my personal favorite, Glitter. Kevin: Let's start with The Exorcist.